Glenn Hauman: A View From Above

Ann Coulter meets Al Franken and, well, she's badly outmatched:

Since Ann can't really compete with Al now that he's a senator, I understand that she's now thinking of running for Senator in Idaho. Because when she says "Idaho", you believe her.

...for misspelling Sir Arthur C. Clarke's name in their memorial reel on World News Tonight. I mean, he was only the man behind the communications satellites that made World News possible in the first place...

Yes, because the windows didn't meet sales expectations. We here at GlennHauman.com hope that the closing of windows will help improve performance metrics in the coming year.

Li'l Bill O'Reilly. Could you tell the difference?

The top twelve insights of conservatives, 2008: My favorite is "Know-nothingness was no longer a stigma, but a badge of honor." Which makes the cries of "No one could have forseen--!" all the more pathetic. I know lots of people who could and did forsee what was going to happen, these are just a few. My question is why people persist in listening to people with lousy track records.

Child maid trafficking into the US: horrifying...

Late at night, the neighbors saw a little girl at the kitchen sink of the house next door. They watched through their window as the child rinsed plates under the open faucet. She wasn't much taller than the counter and the soapy water swallowed her slender arms.

To put the dishes away, she climbed on a chair.

But she was not the daughter of the couple next door doing chores. She was their maid.

...and yet, an improvement from where they came from.

Remembering Mildred Loving. There are days I think that all the people who complain that Barack Obama isn't a US citizen are just the people who remember that when he was born, lots of states wouldn't have allowed his parents to be married. Since they were, he can't possibly be a real American. QED.

From the New York Times:

To the Editor:

James Gleick compares the book to the hammer, “a tool ideally suited to its task.” Indeed, who can imagine crawling (happily) into bed with digital media, sharing a digital story with a child or giving a digital download as a present? Books are objects — of our love and of our lives.

David Jelinek
Brooklyn, Nov. 30, 2008

I'm reading that letter on this web page in my bed at 4:30 in the morning, with the screen as my own booklight. Happily, except for the fact that I can't sleep.

Deadline Hollywood Daily reports that Universal Studios and Dark Horse Comics, the folks who brought us Hellboy II: The Golden Army, are continuing their long-standing relationship and fast-tracking a movie version of The Umbrella Academy. The Eisner-winning series was written by Gerard Way, former intern at DC Comics who later went on to international fame as the frontman for My Chemical Romance.

This proves what I've suspected for a long time: if you're going to do anything big in the world-- rock star, movie mogul, Eisner winner-- you have to stop being an intern at DC.

Okay, it's a screenshot from a Facebook thread. But still. (Thanks, Niki!)

Yep, my browser's slowing down again. In no order:

Half of Doctors Routinely Prescribe Placebos

Half of all American doctors responding to a nationwide survey say they regularly prescribe placebos to patients. The results trouble medical ethicists, who say more research is needed to determine whether doctors must deceive patients in order for placebos to work.

Driftglass:

First Atwater came for Reagan's "welfare queens"
- but I was not a welfare queen so I did not speak out.

Then Gingrich came for the Liberals and the Unions,
- but I was taught to call everyone who disagreed with me a traitor, so I did not speak out.

Then Falwell and Robertson came for the gays,
- but gays are icky, so I did not speak out.

Then Limbaugh came for the Feminazis
- but strong, smart women terrify me, so I did not speak out.

And when they came for me, I had the fucking nerve to pretend to be Shocked!Shocked! that my Party was being run by degenerate lunatics.

Bacon Apple Pie. Hmmmm...

Obama's Branding Genius. And somewhere around here is that Obama/Grateful Dead poster...

What I was thinking of saying at Sheri's funeral: Life's a Very Funny Proposition After All. I'll tell you what I did say in another post.

Why women feel colder than men. Mom, this one's for you.

First, to all the people who didn't make it to see this day. David H. Andrew. The missing from the Lower Ninth. Steve Gilliard. Jim Capozzola. Molly Ivins. All the dead in Iraq and Afghahistan. Martin and Malcolm. Rosa and Medgar. Emmett Till. Cesar and Abbie. Jack and Bobby. Toot. Everyone whose time on this earth ran out before their hope did.

Second... to the new President-elect of these United States. Here's to you, sir.

This day is called the Feast of Barack:

He that outlives this day, and comes safe home,

Will stand a-tiptoe when the day is named,

And rouse him at the name Obama.

He that shall see this day and live t'old age,

Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours,

And say "To-morrow is Obama's Day":

Then will he strip his sleeve and show his scars

And say "These wounds I had on Obama's day."

Old men forget: yet all shall be forgot,

But he'll remember with advantages

What feats he did that day. Then shall our names,

Familiar in his mouth as household words

Indiana, Ohio, Missouri,

West Virginia, Nevada and Georgia,

Be in their flowing cups freshly remembered.

This story shall the good man teach his son;

And Obama's Day shall ne'er go by,

From this day to the ending of the world,

But we in it shall be remembered;

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;

For he today that sheds his blood with me

Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,

This day shall gentle his condition:

And people in America now abed

Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,

And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks

That fought with us upon Obama's day.

Go vote. And if you have the time, volunteer.

...but I'm a registered Republican in New Jersey, and I haven't gotten a single robocall since the primaries ended. I guess they just aren't trying very hard here.

Oh, but wait-- I have gotten fundraising letters. Which shows their priorities, I guess.

All right, really simple. As you may know, Sarah Palin, "champion of smaller government and family values", and Republican nominee for vice-president, was just found guilty of ethics violations in pressuring her subordinates to fire her ex-brother-in-law, Mike Wooten... using the resources of the state to punish Wooten.

Now, imagine she gets elected to vice-president.

Is there a single person reading this who doesn't think that Mike Wooten will be audited by the IRS?

What if he's put on the no-fly list? In Alaska, that's crippling-- they fly everywhere in the state, plus to get to the continental 48, unless you want to drive for hours through Canada.

How about if Wooten has his passport file flagged? If that happens and he's on the no-fly list, he's effectively locked in Alaska permanently.

Is it out of the realm of possibility that his phone would be tapped and his email scrutinized?

Does anybody think that Sarah Palin wouldn't use the powers of her office to continue going after Wooten? And if so, why would you let her get even close to that level of power?

And if she did get this power-- what would stop her from using it on you if you crossed her?

Paul Krugman on the financial crisis:

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Fear and negative equity … The two things we have to fear are fear itself and negative equity, and the depleted capital of financial institutions … Amongst the things we have to fear are fear itself, negative equity, and the depleted capital of financial institutions.

Okay, this is a bad marketing slogan-- the latest from Microsoft:

Windows -- Life Without Walls

Think about it. Walls are actually important to windows-- they keep the window in place. If you don't have a wall in the first place, you have one of three things:

1. Windows aren't needed; there's nothing in the way.

2. Windows are so big and oversized that it becomes a wall in and of itself;

3. Windows falls to the ground hard and crashes.

Maybe they should bring back Seinfeld.